that unnamed other half of me
by carpemermaid
Summary: She couldn't pinpoint the exact moment she started to feel more for her best friend, she was only aware of the fact that, somewhere along the line, making Lavender laugh filled her with a warm, glowing feeling.


_Notes:_ Written for Femslash February and nooreva's HP Femslash Bingo. Unbeta'd, all mistakes are my own. Prompt used: AU: Unrequited.

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They were fast friends, right from the Sorting Ceremony. The first night in Gryffindor Tower they chose beds side by side, and kept the heavy bed hangings cracked to keep each other in their sights as they slept in their new home. Lavender became like another sister to her, with her own twin on the other side of the castle in a different house's tower. Lavender filled that ache Parvati felt when Padma was sorted to Ravenclaw, dividing them where they never had been separated before. She was someone Parvati felt like she could share anything with.

They spent their evenings looking up cosmetic spells, giggling over juicy gossip, and artfully plaiting each other's hair. They chose their classes together, eagerly taking to Divination like birds to flight, and ate their meals together, walking the halls with their arms looped. Their friendship was something Parvati cherished in the first few years at Hogwarts.

She couldn't pinpoint the exact moment she started to feel more for her best friend, she was only aware of the fact that, somewhere along the line, making Lavender laugh filled her with a warm, glowing feeling.

When Lavender painted her lips in a bold red, her delicate fingers holding her lipstick tube like it was a paintbrush, Parvati felt her cheeks prickle with heat. Her hand shook when Lavender handed over the tube of colour for Parvati to paint her plump lips, too. When they walked down to the Quidditch Pitch to cheer on their team, Parvati felt a rush of courage and boldly slipped her hand into Lavenders, twining their fingers together. Lavender shot her a pretty smile. It felt like butterflies were trapped in Parvati's stomach.

They started to hold hands all of the time after that, graduating from hooking their arms together. In Divination Parvati took her time tracing Lavender's life and love lines when they learned about palm reading. She reveled in the way Lavender shivered when her careful caresses skated over her soft skin. When Lavender blushed, Parvati thought it was the prettiest sight she had ever seen. They shared secret smiles across the squat tables in the classroom.

The first time she dreamt of Lavender, they were lolling in the grassy hill where they liked to spend afternoons after classes on warm days, with the sunshine beating down on them and warming their skin. Everything had a hazy edge to it that Parvati struggled to squint through, but she could make out Lavender, lying next to her on her back. Her fingers were teasing a butterfly, making it dance and flit through the air. Parvati didn't give any thought to it before rolling over to lean over Lavender and kiss her. They kissed and kissed and _kissed_ , not needing to come up for air and unaware of the butterfly flapping around their heads as they shared sweet pecks and gentle swipes of their tongues as their lips slid together.

When Parvati woke from that dream her head was filled with thoughts and desires, yearning to make her vision a reality as she suffered through merely holding hands and playing with Lavender's hair. She pined in silence, watching her beautiful friend laugh and smile through D.A. meetings and being bold when the moment struck her. She pushed her luck when she could, resting her head against Lavender's shoulder and crawling into bed with her at night to whisper and tangle their feet together while the other girls in their tower slept on.

Parvati never realised the ache she would feel when Lavender and Ron started dating. She had to try to be supportive for her best friend, be happy for her, but it was so hard to dig up her courage when she felt like she was dying inside every time they kissed. They were sickening, unseparable, and for once she truly empathized with Hermione when she caught her glaring jealously at the couple when they snogged in the courtyard. Parvati sat through hours of Lavender going on and _on_ about what they did that day, and what a great and perfect boyfriend her Won-Won was. Parvati held her hand and nodded silently, mustering up a weak smile when Lavender turned to her with the bright grin she used to have only for things Parvati said to her.

Her heart cracked a little more under the weight of that beautiful, radiant smile.

For as much as she hated seeing Lavender with Ron, nothing prepared her for the nauseating hatred she felt for him when he _ignored her_ , which led to their eventual breakup. He didn't even have the decency to tell Lavender when he didn't want to be with her anymore. The ruthless bastard left Parvati with the responsibility of taking care of Lavender, brokenhearted and soaking her pillow with her tears every night. He never cared for Lavender the way that Parvati did. She let Lavender rest her head in her lap while Parvati stroked her hair and murmured quietly to her, not even complaining when Lavender's snuffling and tears made a wet spot on her nightgown.

Eventually Lavender healed and moved on, much to Parvati's relief. Together they became stronger as the darkness loomed at the edge of their happiness at Hogwarts. When the darkness descended on the school, they had each other to keep them both steady.

It was only as they were using the skills they had learned in the D.A. to battle for Hogwarts, watching in horror as her best friend got attacked by Fenrir Greyback, that Parvati desperately wished she had been a brave enough Gryffindor to tell Lavender that she loved her.


End file.
